VO: The nation's favorite celebrities... Wow.

VO: ..paired up with an expert... Ow.

Ow.

Get it sorted.

VO: ..and a classic car.

She's beautiful.

We're steaming.

VO: Their mission - to scour Britain for antiques.

Is that antique?

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

VO: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction.

But it's no easy ride...

There's a dog chasing us!

VO: Who will find a hidden gem?

I love that.

VO: Who will take the biggest risk?

Ah!

VO: Will anybody follow expert advice?

Yeah, uh, OK, I know what that means.

Whoo-hoo!

VO: There will be worthy winners...

Yes!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

Disaster.

VO: Put your pedal to the metal.

Let's go shopping.

Woo-hoo!

VO: This is the Celebrity Antiques Road Trip!

VO: Kookaburra.

(MUSIC) Come Fly With Me by Peter Andre VO: Is that the voice of Peter Andre?

It is!

He's with showbiz mate Joe Pasquale in that 1966 Lotus Elan hurtling towards an Antiques Road Trip.

What fun!

I said the only antique thing in my home is me!

No, see, you're classic is what you are, you're not an antique, you're classic.

Oh, I like your style!

That charm is gonna get you bargains, I'm telling you, cuz I'd have just given you everything.

I'd give you my clothes right now.

We should just move in together now, just leave it at that.

I think we should.

VO: You heard it here first!

Aussie Brit Peter made the girls swoon with his pop hits in the 1990s.

Joe: We should put a duet out, right?

I was gonna, I was trying to put our names together and it wasn't quite working.

JoPe.

JoPe's good, yeah, yeah.

Peter: JoPe or JP, or PJ.

Kind of what you wear to bed, isn't it?

It is, yeah, put your PJs on.

Yeah, but they're pajamas with my face on the front and yours on the back.

VO: Nice.

Essex boy Joe is a shining star of comedy and panto.

Joe: I've just finished a play but I'm thinking about doing a musical.

Oh, beautiful.

But I'm not a singer so I am gonna need... Oh, you need a... A few lessons.

Think of it in an opera style and count.

So you go... # One, two, three.

# One, two, three.

# One, two, three, four, five.

# One, two, three, four, five.

# One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

# One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

See, see how much more confident you are?

Now you get out on that stage, boy, and you sing!

(LAUGHS) VO: Reach for the stars, eh?

And being pulled into that orbit of celebrity optimism are none other than our own auctioneering headline act, Paul Laidlaw and Catherine Southon.

Ooh!

(LAUGHS) It's great!

VO: In a red 1971 Mini.

Joe Pasquale, a comedian.

Are you not worried that they're not gonna take it seriously enough?

Well, that's the beauty!

I think we'll have so much fun.

CATHERINE: What about Peter?

I think he's going to, I mean he's really stylish, isn't he?

Yeah.

He is not gonna let you have a £20 candlestick.

(LAUGHS) But how can you say no to the lovely Peter Andre?

No, I couldn't say no to Peter Andre.

(LAUGHS) VO: Down girl!

Seriously though, what era interests our celebrity antique hunters?

1910.

JOE: Really?

PETER: 1912.

That far back?

England.

Yeah.

When cars were just sort of coming in and it was around the time of the Titanic.

But that sort of era.

I'm thinking of Downton Abbey, you see.

Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I want to check out what England was like then.

JOE: OK. PETER: What about you?

I would go back to the dinosaurs.

I want to punch a velociraptor on the nose and run away, see if I could actually outrun him.

That's what I want to do.

PETER: If he caught up with you and he kicked you in the arse, would you then be known as a mega sore arse?

VO: Boom boom!

I hope Catherine and Paul are also honing up their witty puns cuz it's time to team up.

PAUL: (LAUGHS) Look at this!

CATHERINE: Hey!

PAUL: How are you doing?

What a car, eh?

Hello, mate.

CATHERINE: That's stylish!

PAUL: The car suits you, sir.

How are you?

I'm alright.

Nice to see you.

Good to see you!

Hello, how are you?

Good to see you, how are you doing?

I'm good.

You have a great face, look at his face!

Catherine, hello.

You're with me.

Oh, I'm with you!

We're straight in.

Get yourself in the middle, there, stat.

No mucking about then.

VO: Nope, time to get moving.

With £400 apiece, our travelling sideshows will be rocking up at the seaside in the southeast and taking in the delightful countryside of Kent before hopping over to auction in East Sussex, God's country.

So I had a show last night in Amsterdam.

Which was crazy because we were on stage last night with twenty odd thousand people, you come offstage.

Got on a plane first thing this morning and here I am in the countryside with the sun out and a beautiful car.

Honestly, it doesn't get better than this.

I mean, you must admit I've... You know, I've done some great things in my life but I've also written some shockers, I have.

(LAUGHS) You wait until after this auction and I'll show you shockers.

Well, I'm looking forward to it... You've seen this before, haven't you?

I'm looking forward to it.

(LAUGHS) If I see one of my albums in this auction in the bargain section I'm going to be very upset!

VO: Ah, what price fame, eh?

And look at poor Joe Pasquale, Squashed into a teeny weeny Mini!

What's the story?

I love really old microscopes.

(GASPS) You and I are gonna get on so well.

No you don't.

Yeah, I do, cuz... Are you saying that just cuz you know I like them?

No, no, no.

Because I'm doing this degree at the Open University in geoscience.

I've got a microscope at home.

Have you?

What microscope is it?

Oh, I can't...

It's just a modern one, I haven't got an antique one, I've just got a modern one.

Oh, we have to buy an old one then.

If we can find an old one it'd be great, yeah.

VO: Well, time and tide wait for no man, as they know only too well in the coastal town of Ramsgate on one of the most easterly points of the British Isles.

VO: In 1876, the artist Van Gogh lived here and described a "harbor full of all kinds of ships" but he would have been unable to imagine today's enormous marina filled with pleasure craft.

Both teams are bound for the harbor and Arch Sixteen Antique, Vintage and Retro Junk.

And Joe and Catherine are first to arrive.

JOE: Here we go then.

Well, what is going through your mind, Joe?

Steptoe and Son.

Oh, is it?

VO: You could play Wilfrid Brambell's part in the remake, Joe!

Move along, the competition is arriving.

This is a good sign, cuz it's right next to a Greek taverna.

It's an omen.

You know?

VO: Might be.

Peter's family is originally from Cyprus.

Shall we do it?

Let's do it.

VO: Right, time to crack on.

Break a leg, or whatever these showbiz people say.

Oh no!

Is it a medical emergency?

High blood pressure?

No, mine's alright.

Yeah, take it, but mine's alright really, it's only gonna go up the longer we stay in this shop.

JOE: Thank you, doctor.

CATHERINE: Ready?

JOE: Yeah, pump it.

No, it's... No you're dead.

You are completely and utterly dead.

I'm definitely dead from the neck down.

There is no hope.

I might as well go and do this myself.

Don't, no, don't... VO: Oh, dear.

How's it going in the eye department?

Can you see an antique?

Because I can't.

(LAUGHS) Well, what... OK, I know antique by definition is more than 100 years old.

Yeah, exactly.

PETER: I mean... PAUL: I jest.

..none of this is 100 years old.

No.

I mean, this was around when I was a teenager.

Although, vinyl is coming back.

Ain't it just.

Who knew?

So is there a chance that someone's gonna walk around...like this again?

No, funny you should say that, because almost certainly not.

That's what we used to do, kids.

VO: It was a Dansette in my day!

Is that the sound of Joe still breathing?

This caught my eye a little while ago but I don't know whether it's valuable to anyone or not.

CATHERINE: Respiratory... JOE: System, yeah.

CATHERINE: ..system.

JOE: There was this... CATHERINE: I like that!

Do you?

Oh, I'm glad you like it cuz I like it.

Yes I do.

I like anatomical models and things like that.

Yeah.

Which can always sell quite well.

Yeah.

These plastic anatomical models.

But this, this is just like a breakdown of the system, how everything works.

How old do you think this could be?

50s?

JOE: Really, that old?

CATHERINE: 60s?

OK. CATHERINE: I don't know, I could see that in a doctor's, I could see that in a pharmacist.

JOE: University, something like that?

CATHERINE: University, like it.

I don't know, it's interesting, isn't it?

JOE: Yeah.

Got a bit of damage to the top, though, on the head.

We've all got a bit of damage to our heads.

Ah, we have today.

Yeah.

(LAUGHS) £30.

Worth looking at, is it?

It's worth kind of bagging.

OK. For later.

A possibility.

JOE: OK. CATHERINE: Yeah?

JOE: I like it, yeah.

CATHERINE: Shall we carry on?

Yes.

Keep looking, then.

Lovely.

CATHERINE: Keep looking.

JOE: Keep looking.

VO: Keep looking.

How are Peter and Paul getting on?

Oh, they've spotted that poster!

Today, these are the height of fashion.

I mean, they're fashionable but they're educational at the same time, they really are.

PAUL: And do you know what, at £30, I'll wager plenty of people would walk in here and go "Fantastic, that's a good buy".

Am I saying we should buy it?

No.

But am I saying it's cause for hope?

This ain't over, we've only just begun this journey!

OK. Alright.

We don't weaken, we just keep looking.

You keep doing what you're doing.

OK, and I have a question for you.

OK. Do you know where the pituitary gland is?

(LAUGHS) See?

It's fashionable and educational.

And that's why we need the... Dunno.

It's right there.

I'm gonna leave you with that thought.

(LAUGHS) The pituitary gland.

Every day's a school day!

VO: Well, it's quite the medical academy in here this morning.

Time to follow Joe and Catherine upstairs.

JOE: Come, come, come up here.

Look, it's an Aladdin's cave up here.

VO: So, Wishy-Washy, any old lamps or suchlike for you?

There's a pommel horse here.

Pommel horse, oh.

It's not just any pommel horse, look.

Property of HMP Broadmoor.

Broadmoor.

Oh, prison?

Prison, prison, yeah.

I like the sound of that.

Do you?

Well, anything from prison's... People are interested in prison stuff, aren't they?

Well, yeah, but...

Imagine all the people that have jumped over that.

Who's been in Broadmoor?

Have you?

No, no, not yet.

There's time.

But I reckon, if I could do a bit of research, find out who was in Broadmoor... Oh, you're really excited about this, aren't you?

Yeah, I am, I'm really excited.

Imagine if somebody like, I don't know, imagine like the Kray twins had jumped over that.

Let's just look at this.

Because the screws are...

They've definitely got age.

When you say screws, do you mean like the guards or do you actually mean the screws?

No, the screws.

Oh, cuz the screws in prison, that's the guards, isn't it?

So you're using all the proper terms.

Oh, am I?

OK, OK. Yeah, if you're like a prison guard... Don't know what you're talking about.

I know you don't.

It's great, I love it.

VO: Perhaps Joe's been watching too many old episodes of Porridge.

I love the fact that you've found something and you are so happy.

Yeah, I'm very happy.

You're really excited.

I am, yeah.

Cuz you weren't... We weren't going anywhere.

No, nowhere at all.

But I am now.

Would you like me to go and find...

Yes, please.

I'll stay here in case anybody else comes up.

If Peter comes up and wants it I'll punch his lights out, so... And then I'll end up in Broadmoor, but it don't matter.

Alright, I'll see you in a second.

VO: Blimey, Joe's taking this hard man stuff quite seriously.

And it's all Greek to Peter!

IVOR: (PLAYS ZORBA THE GREEK) Hey!

Whoop!

Whoopa!

VO: Whoopa!

PETER: Where's Joe?

VO: Ivor, a man of many talents!

VO: Whoopa!

Oh!

VO: Oh!

Watch out for the glasses.

Yes!

Hey, that was brilliant!

That was brilliant.

That was excellent.

It's one of my favorite pieces.

Home away from home!

VO: Great stuff, Ivor!

Right, back to Broadmoor to deal with dealer Thomas.

I am very attracted to your pommel horse.

Oh, right, OK. Could you advise me on what sort of price I could get it for?

Em, well, probably, you're looking about 250 quid.

I have to say I think that's slightly out of my price range.

What is your price range?

My price range is about, if you take zero off of it, that would be around my price range.

THOMAS: I could do 200.

If I paid 150, would you put in the poster downstairs as well for that as well?

THOMAS: How much is that?

I can't remember off the top of my head.

JOE: 30.

30, so what about if we did 165 for the two?

What about if we did 160?

We seem to be going...

I'm completely lost where we are on all of this negotiation.

Oh, don't worry, I know what I'm doing, love.

Don't worry.

OK, go on then.

You have made one man very happy.

Very happy, thank you, Thomas.

THOMAS: With a prisoner's horse?

Yes.

VO: Joe's first deal is locked down.

It's 130 for the horse and 30 for the poster after all that lot.

Mr Pasquale, your work here is done.

But downstairs, is Mr Andre any nearer a purchase?

Peter?

I'll tell you what, this is getting a wee bit hairy, isn't it?

What's that?

Getting a bit nervous?

We've clearly got nothing to worry about compared to whomsoever was flying that.

Oh, yes.

That is the aircraft fuselage, is it not?

No way, is that the real thing?

And "Cut in emergency."

And that's what someone did.

VO: This fuselage isn't a ghoulish wreck of an air crash, it's from a scrapped 1983 Boeing 747.

It's not ancient, but that is... Now I'll tell you what, you know the market for that?

The market for that is irony and humor.

I think you hang that on your wall or you stick it on your big smart shelves.

And I'll tell you what, if you're wanting an attention grabber, is that not it?

Peter: What would you pay for something like that here?

What's it worth to you?

That's... What are you prepared to pay?

But then what could we resell it for, what do you think it would fetch in an auction?

Really?

Who knows?

Pessimistically, 20, 30, £40.

On a good day, who knows, on a good day two people go crazy and it makes a fortune, but... PETER: I'll ask him.

PAUL: OK. Hello, Ivor!

What are you asking for for this?

Can you imagine it on the wall?

Like it could look extremely... Yeah, yeah.

I'm asking £25 for it.

Just give me another price, so... Could you come back to me with a figure?

Hmm.

15?

We'll do 15.

Thank you very much.

Deal.

Brilliant.

Thank you.

Oh, was I supposed to do a deal?

I just did a deal.

Is that OK?

Hey, respect!

Oh!

Thank you!

VO: Nice one.

Anything else?

What is that?

That is a 1970s Peugeot 103 moped.

No way!

PETER: You know, kind of, it's not in good nick, obviously.

But it's actually nice to be in this nick.

PAUL: Now, I don't know whether it runs but I'll tell you what I do know.

I know what that price tag says.

Have you seen it?

PETER: I didn't expect that, yeah.

I thought it was going to be 100 or something around that.

All day long.

If that had had 150 I'd have gone that's not a bad project for someone.

What?

PETER: It's actually a beautiful piece but you know what?

It is good at 30 but we're here not to just take what we get.

Aw, I love the way you think.

We've got to, we've got to ask him for less than that.

VO: Do you?

OK, best call Thomas.

Thomas!

Thomas.

Hi.

Now, look.

What's the state of this?

I mean, we love it.

I see the price here is 30.

Uh, 25?

Deal.

Deal.

Thank you so much.

Excellent.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

VO: Pockets £40 lighter and with 360 left, Peter and Paul are ready for the off.

Bye bye.

VO: Bye bye.

VO: Joe and Catherine are on the north Kent coast now, bound for the town of Whitstable with its charming harbor and pretty shingle beaches.

And whilst a British day out at the seaside might traditionally include fish and chips and a 99, the special on Joe and Catherine's menu today is shellfish.

My nan used to have all this stuff that she'd get from the market.

And she'd have a winkle eating party.

Remember we... Oh, disgusting!

They're the things you get with a pin?

JOE: Yeah.

CATHERINE: Oh!

They're like bogies with a crash helmet.

That's horrible.

VO: Yuck!

But we're not spoiling them with winkles, oh no.

Their treat today is another local delicacy, the humble whelk.

They're meeting Graham West, whose family has been whelk fishing here for 200 years, catching these sea snails in the traditional way with iron framed pots.

I've been eating whelks since I was a kid, Graham, but when did they become popular to the masses?

Probably about 1800s, turn of the century, round then.

Because the industrial revolution, large masses of workers needed the cheap food.

JOE: How much were they, Graham?

About 10 for a penny, so... Really?

Yeah.

Very very very cheap.

You'd get that many?

Very, very cheap VO: And cheap, ready cooked food was what Victorian London's booming working class population required.

And there were thousands of stalls and barrows serving it up.

Whitstable's fishing industry grew to meet the demand, aided in 1832 by a new harbor and a rail link into London with speedy access to Billingsgate's fish market.

Tons and tons and tons of shellfish and other white fish was being caught and sent by trains to London.

It is easily accessible, an hour and a half to get to London on the train.

So it opened the whole of the southeast of England up in the fishing industry.

Joe, you've had whelks before?

Loads of times.

Have you had whelks, Catherine?

No.

Well, I'll show you how to cook them.

Let's go.

Each one of them is a 12.5 kg bag.

It's called a wash which is an old traditional measurement.

Those bags are 65 years old, they're antiques.

Oh, we should buy them!

Ah, we can, look at them, yes!

They will be then put for a time in here.

Yeah.

Leave them to boil and once they are cooked they can then go out, chill down, ready to be picked onwards and packed onwards.

How long do you keep them for?

Takes about seven minutes to do that amount around there.

Which is...

It smells really good.

It smells like, I don't know, like bisque.

It smells like fish soup.

Fish soup.

VO: Yum, yum, I'm feeling hungry!

Once the whelks were boiled they'd have been packed into barrels by an army of fishwives and shipped off or sold locally to flocks of seaside day-trippers.

Seven minutes is up.

Time for some alfresco escargot!

Right, go on then, you start.

OK.

I'm definitely taking that small one.

You can have that big one.

I'll have the fat one.

Yeah, but you're an actor!

No, I'm not, I love it.

And a comedian.

(LAUGHS) That is disgusting.

That's a delicacy for you.

Sorry!

Don't apologize, I love it.

Sorry.

You love them or you hate them.

It's clearly not for me but obviously they were a delicacy.

You either love them or you hate them.

They are a seaside delicacy, they are a London delicacy, any major cities with the working classes and now they are slowly, well, they have become an international delicacy.

The majority of the whelks now go to China, Asia... Really?

..all over the world VO: Bon appétit, then.

VO: Well, our day is done.

Time for our road trippers to wend their way home.

I have no idea where I am, but I love it.

I don't know if we've gone wrong and we should have gone that way.

Oh, listen, we went wrong as soon as we got in the Mini, love.

(LAUGHS) Listen, I'm from Australia, man, I don't know where I'm going.

If you said Sydney, I'd go that way.

VO: Well, wherever you end up, sleep tight.

VO: And ere long our stars are back out and still high on the fun they had yesterday.

I couldn't believe he could play the piano.

He was great at that, wasn't it?

Yeah, he played Zorba the Greek and I said to him "What would you... what would the song be called "if we were doing an advert for kitchen rolls.

"Absorba the Greek".

VO: Oh!

He's Peter Pun, isn't he?

I've moved into the scrap department.

(LAUGHS) I kid you not!

Yes.

Welcome!

VO: No kidding.

PETER: I'm actually buzzing about this and I'm actually really excited about the auction already.

Yeah.

So am I. VO: So am I.

But first, time for our swingers to rendezvous, swap keys and see what's in the boot.

Morning!

Hello!

It's not made for a tall bloke.

Have you discussed mutual purchases?

Uh, sort of, but not in detail.

I'm excited.

I think we're both excited.

We've been talking about it.

It's good times.

Did you regret what I bought yesterday?

Not at all.

Cuz I'm still excited about it.

I actually told Pete this morning I had a little bit of wee come out.

That's how excited I was.

VO: Uh, moving strictly on.

I actually think, though, you're gonna be impressed with this.

Oh, see, I know what that is already.

PETER: Look at that.

Yeah, I don't know what it's from but...

It's from a plane, isn't it?

Yep, 2015, 19th of Feb, broken at MSE.

I wonder what sort of plane it was from.

PAUL: See, scrap.

I like it.

It is literally scrap!

What does aluminum weigh in at the moment?

If I had of seen that, I would have got that.

Would you?

Yeah.

I love it.

Because I fly, I've got a pilot's license.

PETER: Yeah, you do!

JOE: Yeah.

You have a pilot's license, that's right.

Who's gonna walk past that and not ask the question "Oh, my word, what's the story behind that?"

Personally, I think it looks quite "plain".

(LAUGHS) Ah, very good, very good.

All night, you had all night, Peter, and that's the best?

It's been stewing.

It's good, mate.

It's good gear.

I got it for 15, I was really happy about that.

Oh, I'd be happy with 15 quid for that as well.

Shall we show them ours, then?

Oh, yeah.

Well, have we got... what have we got with us?

We haven't got it in the Mini, the big one, have we?

No, shush, come this way, come this way.

PETER: A big one!

We've got a big one and a little one.

PETER: Oh, hang on a second.

JOE: Yeah.

VO: No flat packed pommel horse in this boot.

Just the poster.

CATHERINE: Do you wanna hold this up?

JOE: Yeah.

Wait a minute!

PETER: See?

PAUL: Wait a minute!

PETER: We saw this, didn't we?

I thought it was cheap at a tenner.

Shut up.

Should we roll it up but should you just... yeah.

Very good.

We're happy with it!

What did you pay for it?

JOE: 30 quid, isn't it?

Not £10, yeah 30.

PAUL: 30, yeah, that's nice, yeah.

We wrapped it up in a deal.

JOE: We had a deal, 160 for the two items.

That one is definitely something that we saw and was like "Wow, that is a definite..." CATHERINE: But not at £30.

Shall we go?

Yeah, please.

PETER: Right.

VO: Yes, go forth and multiply those antiques.

Are they driving on someone's lawn?

Yesterday Joe also bet quite a sum on a pommel horse emblazoned with the name Broadmoor.

Imagine like the Kray twins had jumped over that.

VO: So he and Catherine set out today with £240.

While Peter also fancied a formerly functional 1970s moped.

No way!

VO: Which means he and Paul still have quite a princely budget of £360.

What did you think of their purchase?

Well, you know, we could have bought that.

PETER: We could have, yeah.

They paid the actual price that he asked for.

Now, where's the bargaining power here?

They need Paul.

(LAUGHS) They need you!

You are all over this, aren't you?

Mate, I've been watching you.

I've been watching...

These glasses, both the glasses I've had have got little extra cameras that point to you so I can see your facial expressions and everything.

Why do you think I'm wearing them all the time?

I've even worn them when it's not sunny.

I would rather be with you than against you, Peter Andre.

Oh, mate, I want it, I want it.

VO: Best stay on his good side then!

The chaps are headed for the first port of call at Faversham which sits close to the Swale, a channel in the Thames estuary separating mainland Kent from the Isle of Sheppey.

Their next shop is the charming Aladdin's Loft and there's owner Carol and her daughter, Phoebe, waving them in.

It all looks very promising.

Right, give us a shout if you need any help.

Yeah, thank you, thank you very much.

Have a good time.

And you're working on your summer holidays!

VO: Never did me any harm!

If this delivers on my expectations, head blown.

So.

1920s, 30s, silk, who cares?

But... "My heart is in Scotland" embroidered postcard or my heart may be in Scotland.

Hmm, I did think that.

I mean mine's in Australia, but listen, I'm happy.

I love England too, and Scotland.

These, stylistically, are Glasgow roses.

Something reminiscent of, let's say, Rennie Mackintosh.

But I'm not interested in these roses, I'm interested in these poppies.

Now.

What do we get for our money here?

A period card and clearly a somewhat aged dried poppy.

First thing I'm looking at is the date.

1917.

PETER: 1917, oh wow!

Shall I give you that, Peter?

Look at that, this one's dated 1918 as well.

PAUL: What is it?

Poppy from between Ervillers and something -seaux to the left of Saint- somewhere else in France.

Violets...

Violets?

Violets from destroyed church at something.

Achiet-le-Grand?

1917.

Right.

There is your violet.

Oh, I see.

There is your violet.

Someone treasured this.

This was sent back to someone's sweetheart.

Oh no, but that makes me sad.

Because why, why is it here?

You know what I mean?

Because it was important to a couple 101 years ago.

Yeah.

PAUL: So who was she?

What does that say?

This is so tantalizing.

"To Winnie".

No?

"From..." PETER: Yes, yeah, Winnie.

PAUL: "..her devoted hubby, France, July 1918."

That woman's husband is going through things that you and I... Yeah.

..thankfully will never comprehend or experience.

And he in a moment of tranquility picked these flowers and sent them back home.

That's...

Brilliant, isn't it?

Big, isn't it?

Why is it here?

Kind of, it's playing on my mind.

Because I think of my parents, I couldn't think of my mum's things being not with me or with my children or their children.

I can't...

So unless the family, you know, there's no family left.

It's a possibility.

I'm gonna go and take it to the lady.

We've definitely gotta get it.

Not gonna haggle on the price, though.

Yeah?

Magic!

Awesome.

VO: The price tag is £65.

This is a little beauty.

Um... OK.

If you can hold it for us?

I will.

We are not gonna haggle on the price with this one.

OK. Because we think it's a little precious gem.

We will haggle on prices for other things, though, just to make you aware.

OK, alright then.

But not this one.

That's very good of you.

It's all done with a smile!

See you in a moment.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Bye bye.

VO: Cor, he's a smooth operator, isn't he?

Let's catch up with Widow Twankey and Wishy Washy on their magic carpet.

I actually went up with the Red Arrows about 10 years ago and they let me take control of the plane and that was... Wow!

That's what got me into flying, really.

CATHERINE: What an experience!

JOE: Oh, it was, yeah.

CATHERINE: What was that like?

That must have been mindblowing.

I think the plane at the time was worth about 40 million quid.

And the guy in charge of the plane at the time said "You have control, sir".

And I had the stick and I was too petrified to do anything with it.

Oh, my goodness.

But, yeah, it was just the most amazing experience ever.

There's a lot more to you than meets the eye.

Oh, yeah, there's a, I'm a bit of a dark horse.

VO: Joe and Catherine are cantering towards Sittingbourne, which grew up by ancient Roman Watling Street and later welcomed medieval pilgrims making their way to Canterbury.

Joe and Catherine's pilgrimage today is to Wild Winds Emporium.

I challenge you to buy something smaller.

And better.

Better?

I can do that.

Promising!

VO: I like Joe's pommel horse!

I'm sure he'll find more interesting things here.

Better leave the number ones to Peter, I think.

Or at least the number twos.

VO: Oh, behave yourself!

Back at Faversham, let's see if our pop idol has found another hit.

Ooh.

Ho ho ho.

1889.

Hand painted picture plate.

Oh, I like that.

Oh, I've got to go and show Paul this.

Paul!

Hello.

OK, it looks like a nice plate, yeah?

Hand painted in 1889.

Yeah.

How good's that?

Is that a good find, no it's not?

Uh, it's not a bad find.

I'll tell you what you got, mate.

Now, what can I tell you about it?

I don't think it was produced commercially.

OK.

I think a genteel lady, perhaps, late Victorian era, maybe influenced by the arts and crafts movement whose genesis is around and about this time.

And that was a rejection of mass production in favor of a return to individual craftsmanship, the artisan.

And I think a somewhat skilled artist bought a glazed blank, enameled it, painted it, put their monogram to it and a date.

And then baked this off in the oven.

But I mean, it is antique.

It's officially antique.

It's officially rather good.

You picked it up, do you like it?

Yeah, yeah.

I do, because I think this would do really well in an auction.

VO: That's Venus and Cupid and it's priced at £21.

Obviously I'm gonna haggle on this one.

I'm gonna haggle on this.

You frighten me, please can you kind of rein it in, wind it back in?

I'm looking her right in the eye and I'm saying "You will not be getting £21 for this!"

VO: Go, Mr Nice Guy!

Just check that smile.

OK. Hello.

What is your best price on this?

Um, the best price on this one, I know the dealer quite well, it's got 21 on it, but I'm pretty sure she'd do it for 12.

VO: 12?!

Oh wow.

Oh, done, done, done.

VO: And 65 for the poppy makes that £77, leaving a pocketful of £283 left.

All the best, see you soon.

Thank you very much, bye bye.

Thanks for your help as well, guys, appreciate it.

Thanks for visiting.

VO: Abracadabra, they're gone!

But how are they performing over in Sittingbourne?

It's behind you!

It's behind you!

CATHERINE: Anything shouting at you?

JOE: Um, there's things are shouting at me, but it's not shouting the things I want to hear.

It's shouting "Don't buy me".

CATHERINE: Is it?

JOE: Yeah.

CATHERINE: Oh, OK. JOE: Yeah.

VO: There must be something with your name on it.

Cup of Irish coffee?

No thanks.

I'm OK, thank you.

VO: Luggage rack?

CATHERINE: What do you think?

Wouldn't you expect that to be on a train or something?

Yeah.

I would've thought you would have like the name of the... JOE: Yeah, it obviously had Great Western Railways, GWR, that sort of stuff on it, wouldn't it?

But this is almost a bit too fancy for that.

Is it?

So this.

These hooks are for your coat, for your bags, probably.

Yeah.

Bags, and then putting luggage on the top.

What do you reckon, 1940s?

Or later?

I would actually go maybe even slightly earlier, rather... Would you?

..than later.

Yeah.

JOE: I like it.

If we can get it down cheaper, I think we should have a go at it.

VO: £45 on the ticket, time to call in owner Janette.

The both of us like the look of this.

This rack here.

The coatrack?

OK. Can you tell us anything about it?

Well, we don't know for sure.

It's French and we think it may possibly have come out of a railway carriage.

You will see there is meant to be something here.

JOE: Yeah, the brackets, we saw them.

JANETTE: Yeah, it was a mirror.

JOE: Ah.

And unfortunately it got damaged.

CATHERINE: Right.

And so it's now missing.

CATHERINE: Oh, yes, these are perfect for that, aren't they?

Yeah.

I imagine if anybody wanted to buy that, you could probably get that replaced and make it a complete piece again.

CATHERINE: Nice beveled mirrors.

JANETTE: Yes.

Can I ask you about the price?

It says £45 on there.

Can I ask you what your best price on this would be?

Oh.

Yeah, I mean, we could do something on that for you.

We could do 30?

I think at £30 we'd probably bite your hand off, really, I reckon.

Oh, 35, then!

(LAUGHS) No, not bite, we'd just lick your hand for 35.

JOE: Here's £20.

Lovely.

And there's another £10.

OK, 10, 30 English pounds.

Brilliant, thank you very much.

VO: Quick, Janette!

Before he licks your hand.

VO: OK, cheerio.

We'll see you later.

VO: Right, that's enough of this shopping malarkey.

The sun is splitting the sky and it's time for... VO: ..Peter and Paul to head for the coast.

They're headed east to Margate on the trail of two men who first brought people flocking to this seaside town for all the fun of the fair.

And where you happen to be in luck if you fancy a ride on Britain's oldest rollercoaster.

Down on the beach they're meeting Rebecca Ellis from Margate's amusement park, Dreamland, which has its roots in the Victorian love of a day out at the seaside.

And back then, who is coming to Margate?

Everyone was coming to Margate.

Because it was such an attractive destination and because there was affordable transport to get down to Margate and its proximity to London, it really was a destination for everybody to come on their weekends and holidays.

VO: In 1870, showman and circus proprietor George Sanger spotted a gap in the market and created a pleasure garden complex with sideshows and a menagerie to entertain the tourists.

There was a high diving show, one of the first female wall of death riders on a motorbike... PETER: Oh, wow.

..that went round was here in Margate as part of Sanger's circus show.

So a whole kind of wonderful realm of entertainment.

PETER: So he was a visionary and he wanted to make this place a place to remember.

Yeah.

And he's definitely done that.

Unfortunately he died in 1911 and there was this story around his death that he actually was murdered by the strongman who was having an affair with his wife.

And I don't know how much fact there is to that but I've seen the news article in the Margate museum, which does say that he was bludgeoned.

What a circus!

VO: And into the ring in 1919 came businessman John Henry Iles, who had been inspired by the fairgrounds of New York's Coney Island to create amusement parks in cities like Berlin and Pittsburgh.

He built on the success of George Sanger's Victorian carnival with a big wheel and new thrilling 20th century rides.

He went over to Coney Island in New York and there was an area of Coney Island called Dreamland and he brought that back to Margate.

And Henry Iles's Dreamland is over there, I take it?

It is indeed, and we're gonna head over there right now.

PETER: Look at this place, honestly.

How old are you now, Peter?

Six years old.

I'm not far behind there.

I mean, and it's such a beautiful day as well, it just really adds to it, doesn't it?

Astonishing, isn't it?

After Sanger died, Henry Iles took over the park, which he bought for the princely sum of £40,000.

And he developed it for £400,000, which equates to around £15 million in today's money.

PETER: Wow.

He built a ballroom for entertainment, where he would house concerts and dances.

He brought in a big wheel and he also was really into the kind of mechanical rides and amusements that were coming out at the time, to kind of reinvent a day out at the seaside.

Some of these rides look quite early themselves?

Yes, this carousel was actually at Dreamland in the 1920s and 30s.

If you think of an amusement park, the first thing that comes into your mind is rollercoaster.

How old is this rollercoaster?

She is 98 years old.

PETER: 98!

Nearly 100.

Hundreds of thousands of people came here for the opening of the scenic railway.

I think it was just over half a million visitors came in the first opening weekend.

PETER: Shall we do it?

Shall we head onto the ride?

PAUL: Yeah, go on.

PETER: Ah, sounds amazing.

VO: The wooden lattice framework was built to support 1.2 kilometers of track containing two cable lifts with double drops carrying cars travelling at a top speed of 35mph.

Front row, fellas!

Well, it's been nice knowing you, chap!

I'm telling you!

Yaay!

Wow!

Alright.

Yeah!

I'll tell you what, I bet you they could hear the punters screaming on the beach.

PETER: Oh, absolutely, absolutely.

Woo!

Wow.

There's some speed on it.

Woah!

Some proper speed on that.

I mean, imagine, right?

They didn't have fast cars or anything like that.

And this would have been the first experience of like that, that force.

Do you know what?

You're right, I hadn't thought of that!

This'd be the fastest you'd ever travel!

Yeah, it would be the fastest, exactly.

VO: Whee!

See you later!

Not too much later, though.

VO: You're sharing the last shop and Joe and Catherine will be first to the quintessentially quaint village of Chilham.

VO: Bagham Barn Antiques houses an abundance of beautiful things, presided over by owner Peggy.

And Joe still has £210 at his disposal.

See anything that catches your eye?

VO: Catherine's on to something.

What have you found, anything?

I thought that was ivory, but it's not, it's plastic.

Bakelite.

Bakelite, that's the first sort of plastic there was, wasn't it?

CATHERINE: Yeah.

JOE: Yeah.

30s.

Is it, um, it's binoculars, isn't it?

And a compass.

CATHERINE: It's got a compass and a mirror.

JOE: Oh.

CATHERINE: And... Oh, these come out.

Yes.

Like little magnifiers.

Yes, binoculars, look, early binoculars.

VO: Better?

Or worse?

Oh, wow, yeah, look.

If you look through that way, have a look there.

It's good, isn't it?

My head looks massive then, doesn't it?

It's in perfect condition, though, because Bakelite is just... Well, I mean...

I know, it breaks very easy, doesn't it?

It's very brittle.

It does break.

So these are sort of telescopic and go up and down.

I like them.

And then you fold this in, fold this one in.

Fold these in.

JOE: In your pocket, I like that a lot.

Do you like it?

I think that's a neat little piece.

I reckon, then, this could be a little old lady's thing that she'd go round looking for her dog with the compass, going "Where is my little dog?"

And the dog would be a Chihuahua and his name would be Rupert, right?

She'd go "Where's Rupert?

He's gone."

And she'd have to find him with a little biscuit, a little dog biscuit.

Aww!

"Rupert, where are you?"

And she'd find him with that.

You're painting this really sad picture.

It's not sad cuz she finds him in the end.

Oh, well, that's alright, then.

She finds him eating a kebab.

£33.

That's alright.

I like it a lot.

It's in very good nick, though.

Novelty, and that's what I like about it.

And it's perfect, absolutely perfect condition.

JOE: OK. Shall we put this on our list?

Yep.

VO: You do that.

Oh, here's the competition with £283 burning a hole in their pocket.

PAUL: Standoff.

PETER: Oh!

Oh, yeah.

How're you getting on?

Yeah, we're doing better than you, I know that much.

PETER: Yeah?

OK. (LAUGHS) We're looking up to you now but I think you might be looking up to us at the auction.

PAUL: It's a good line, it's a good line.

That was pretty good, wasn't it?

But I love him, that's the problem.

So I really shouldn't say that.

Should we, um...

I really hope you do very well.

Do you want to go down the middle, or do you want us to go down the middle?

(LAUGHS) Go on.

Go on.

JOE: I'll go first.

PETER: He's such a love.

And you're such a love.

Did she slap you?

I think that was abuse.

PAUL: That was rude.

PETER: I don't know, we should call that in, I think.

VO: Be nice, or there'll be no ice cream later.

Oof!

Now, see, in my experience, upstairs is where the stuff ends up that is hard work.

But this looks easily as rich as downstairs.

I cannot believe what I've just seen.

Look at this.

I assume that's how you travel to a...

This is the way to travel.

All your suits.

PETER: Oh, my gosh, how amazing is that?

You've got your Bugatti Royale, you've got this on the back, you've got... Yeah.

.. your partner next to you, it's all good.

It's not gonna work.

What do you mean, it works for me!

No, it's not gonna work, I've got four kids.

(LAUGHS) VO: And it's £1,450!

Anything in the price range downstairs?

CATHERINE: Boules.

JOE: Boules.

French boules.

Petanque, petanque.

They're colored ones, I don't often see the colored ones.

CATHERINE: They're really strong, vivid colors.

I don't think they probably will be played with again because they're lovely, the patina is fantastic.

Very simply pine box with a very simple locking mechanism.

Yeah, looks lovely.

It's a good nick.

Nice, isn't it?

JOE: How old is it?

1940s.

CATHERINE: 40s.

You like?

I like it a lot.

I like the green one.

It's my favorite color, green.

Is it?

Really is, yeah.

Yeah.

Like an apple.

Very much like an apple.

They're quite expensive, though.

What's on them?

78 quid.

(SQUEAKS) If we can get the price down is it worth pursuing?

I like using that word, pursuing.

Pursuing.

Do you want to pursue?

I would like to pursue if we can get the price down.

OK.

I'm gonna leave it to you.

Leave it to me.

See, what a catch.

And your green apple.

Shall we throw the other thing into the mix as well?

JOE: Ah, yeah, the binoculars?

The binoculars.

Yeah, OK. Do you want to get the binoculars?

Yep.

I'll meet you back, if I find Peggy, I'll meet you at the till.

Meet you at the till.

Lovely girl.

Oh, it's nice.

VO: Are you being served?

Hi, Peggy.

Hi, Joe.

How are you?

Good.

We found a couple of items which we have got our eye on, we'd like to purchase.

It all depends on the price, because they're both a little bit pricey for what we have.

OK. OK. Now, this one here, this is the French boules.

Yes.

They're £78.

Yes.

I would like to know, Catherine and myself would like to know, what is the best price you could do for us on this?

Joe, I think... 78, they could be 65.

CATHERINE: You couldn't do 60 on them?

78 is good, but, for Joe, 60.

Ah!

She likes you, Joe!

JOE: Really?

PEGGY: I will!

Give us a cuddle.

Thank you, Peggy.

60's great.

OK. We have a second item which we'd like to look at as well.

That's our other item.

This, again, you've picked another rare piece.

25.

(GASPS) Oh, wow!

25.

You can do 25 on that?

25.

Oh, OK. VO: A total of £85.

Joe and Catherine are all spent up.

Cheers, Peggy.

Thanks, lovely.

Thank you.

Right, let's go.

VO: Meanwhile, what is Peter Andre doing with his hair?

That's the principle.

But... (LAUGHS) Oh, look.

Look, mysterious curl.

(LAUGHS) PAUL: Hair straighteners, curling tongs, what do they all have in common?

They need to be hot.

Yes.

That's exactly right.

(SIGHS) Da-da, da-da, da!

There is a little burner.

No there is not!

Spirit burner.

And we fill this with meths or whatever.

You're joking!

We light this.

Well, we probably get our maidservant to do it because this is a high class... Of course, and, you know, we've got to get the footman to carry this.

Absolutely.

And there you go, hands-free.

Let it heat up.

Get it sorted.

How long ago are we talking?

In this instance, 1890, 1892?

And, do you know what, to find not any set, but a planished silver set.

Boom.

VO: Boom.

Boom boom!

Uh, Peggy?

Peggy?

Yes?

Hello.

How are you?

Very good, thank you.

The reason I'm smiling is cuz I want to know what best price you can do for me on this?

Alright.

OK.

Right.

Um, 65?

Sounds like a deal.

VO: So it does.

Shopping is over.

Step away from the antiques!

Next stop auction.

Nowhere to hide now!

It's done.

I'm excited, guys.

I am excited.

You've gotta get ready to lose, though, boys.

There's no going back!

We don't wanna go back.

We don't wanna go back.

I wouldn't mind!

VO: No, it's a one way street.

Until tomorrow, then.

Sweet dreams.

PETER: Yeah!

VO: What larks, eh?

Time to leave Kent and take these great expectations over the county border to Heathfield in East Sussex.

It's all a bit of a gamble, you know?

You know, I'm hanging everything on my vaulting horse, on my pommel horse thing from the prison.

I've got this pommel horse from the prison.

I don't even know that.

Oh, OK. Well, you didn't flipping tell me that one.

I've got this pommel horse... You had it hidden, didn't you?

Yeah, we can't really hide it.

It's the size of a horse.

Oh.

And on the side it actually says "Property of HMP Broadmoor".

PETER: What?!

Now, I reckon someone sees that round here and goes "I'm having that.

That's a talking point."

So I'm hanging everything on it.

I paid 130 quid for it.

Well, I would hang everything on it for that price.

VO: We shall see.

Watsons are our auctioneers today and Peter and Joe are looking dazzling this morning.

Positively an advertisement for washing powder.

How are you, team?

CATHERINE: Oh, look at this!

I'm just saying, me and Joe did not know we were both gonna wear white shirts today.

JOE: Look at us!

It seems to be a common thing.

CATHERINE: They've done it again!

PAUL: What is this about?

PETER: We've done it again.

PAUL: Hey, how you doing, man?

CATHERINE: Good to see you!

PETER: How are you?

PAUL: I'm good.

Good to see you.

Look forward to this.

PETER: It's nice to see you too.

JOE: Can I have a cuddle?

PAUL: Of course.

PAUL: Good to see you.

CATHERINE: Good to see your matching outfits.

VO: Right, enough sartorial chat, the auction won't win itself!

Joe and Catherine spent a grand total of 300 Great British Pounds on five lots.

Ah, now, this I like.

Why?

PETER: Probably because it's a gadget.

It's a man thing, Peter, isn't it?

We're all the same.

Wow, you are incredibly handsome.

I don't bear up to scrutiny.

PAUL: They paid £25.

Yeah.

Yeah, I can see that.

What do you think it will fetch?

That's pretty close to the going rate for those.

They are not rare.

I think they're gonna make a little profit.

OK. OK.

Nothing to worry about.

Hats off to them.

Good thing, yeah?

Yeah, it's...

I like that.

VO: And Peter and Paul shelled out a more modest £182 on their five lots.

Oh, look, look, look.

I think this is Peter and Paul's bike.

CATHERINE: Can I say that it looks a bit junky?

Yeah.

It is junk, it's junk.

There's no engine on it.

I don't think they're gonna get anything for this.

The wheel's coming off, there's nothing there.

Rubbish.

Yes, it's cack, love.

It's pants.

Complete pants.

Rubbish, rubbish.

Let's keep going.

VO: Harsh, my friend.

Any kind words from auctioneer Debbie Patrick?

(GAVEL) The poster of the respiratory system is an interesting item.

Medical items usually do sell quite well.

It does have a little bit of damage to it but I can still see that selling OK.

The silk box poppy and postcard set that contains the World War I postcards is a lovely item, very poignant.

I think we'll have a lot of people that have got an interest in history be interested in that one.

VO: It's showtime!

Please be seated.

PETER: Look at this!

Well, there's a crowd, Peter.

Oh, yes.

JOE: It's big, isn't it?

They're all coming to buy the moped.

(LAUGHS) VO: Brace, brace!

It's Peter and Paul's aircraft fuselage up first.

£20.

20 we've got, 20 we've got.

Do we see 22 anywhere?

£22.

Unusual item at 22.

PAUL: Should be more than that.

How much did we pay?

There's more hands in the air.

It's still going up.

28.

30.

£30, we're still in the center at 30.

How about 32?

£32 on this one?

Take it.

That's doubled your money.

At £30?

(GAVEL) VO: Peter and Paul double their money!

Yes!

15 quid profit, well done, sir.

Yeah, it's not bad.

VO: Next up is the pommel horse from Broadmoor.

Will it vault into profit?

We are starting this one at 90.

95.

100.

100.

110.

120.

Oh!

AUCTIONEER: 130.

CATHERINE: Oh!

(LAUGHS) 140.

140.

140.

150.

160.

Joe, you're a genius!

£170.

We're at the back at 170.

Do we see 180?

£180?

JOE: Come on, do it, do it, do it.

Selling, then, at £170.

JOE: Do it, do it, buy it, please.

(GAVEL) Done.

VO: £40 to the Kray twins...

I mean Joe and Catherine!

Oh my goodness me!

Well done, guys!

Well done!

Fantastic.

That is brilliant.

VO: Time now for Peter and Paul's poppy and postcards from the First World War battlefields.

We're starting this one at 55.

60.

65.

65 we've got.

Gonna be some competition.

£70 on this one.

We are on the book at 65.

70.

75.

80.

80 beats me.

80.

85.

£85.

We're in the center at 85.

Do we see 90?

90 we've got.

CATHERINE: Excellent.

JOE: Yeah.

AUCTIONEER: 95, Sir?

95.

100.

£100, we're at the back of the room at 100.

Do we see 110?

How do you put a price on this?

It's worth whatever you want to pay for it.

We're gonna be selling, then, at £100.

110, back in.

120, sir?

110.

Are we done?

Ah, come again!

At £110?

(GAVEL) VO: A goodly profit there for the day's most poignant lot.

I would have been sad if that had floundered.

Like, no justice.

Would have been... Yeah.

No, no.

I'm really happy about that.

VO: Next, will Joe and Catherine find a fortune with their Bakelite compass and magnifiers?

10.

12.

15.

18.

VO: Oh, look, starting young!

25.

28, sir?

£25.

25 we've got.

She was bidding over there.

She's stopped.

AUCTIONEER: 30.

32.

35.

This is profit, Joe, this is brilliant.

I said 40 quid, didn't I?

I'm gonna go shopping with you all the time.

42, anywhere?

£42?

We are selling, then.

(GAVEL) VO: Hey, another profit!

These guys are really good at this!

That's great!

I loved those.

I loved those.

VO: Now, can Peter and Paul's arts and crafts plate serve up another winner?

20?

£20.

Tenner?

£10?

£10?

Tenner we've got.

10.

12.

15.

18.

There you go.

£5, good.

£5, good.

£20 on this one?

20, we've got.

22, sir?

22.

25, sir?

£22.

22.

25.

New bidder.

Yeah, they're coming up everywhere.

30, sir?

30.

32.

35, sir?

35.

It's a slow burner, this.

Yeah.

Slow burner, this.

Selling, then, at £35?

(GAVEL) VO: They've almost trebled their money there!

CATHERINE: Yay!

PETER: Yes!

Well done, mate.

PAUL: Well done!

PETER: Thank you.

JOE: Well done, big boy.

PAUL: Peter, that was your work!

Ah, thank you!

VO: All aboard for Joe and Catherine's luggage rack, under the hammer next!

£20?

Tenner.

10 we've got.

10.

12.

15, sir?

15 we have, 15 we have.

How about 18?

£18, I have you at 15, sir.

Do we see £18 on this one?

18 we have.

18.

20.

There's a few hands in the air.

It's doing alright.

25.

28?

30.

32, sir?

Yes!

AUCTIONEER: 32.

JOE: Yes!

35.

38, sir?

38.

This is painfully slow.

A slow burner this!

I don't care about how slow it is or the pain, I just want it...

This is good, this is good, this is really good.

50.

55.

AUCTIONEER: £55, it's on my left at 55.

Do we see 60?

£60 on this one?

We are going to be selling, then, at £55.

(GAVEL) VO: Neither has lost a penny and they're almost neck and neck!

PAUL: That was good.

JOE: Well done, lovely.

CATHERINE: Well done.

PAUL: Yeah.

JOE: £25 profit on that one.

PAUL: That was good.

VO: Right, time for Peter's 1970s funky moped.

Well, formerly funky moped!

1970s.

Three years younger than me.

It's in better condition.

AUCTIONEER: £20.

PETER: What do you mean 20?

Tenner?

Good project for someone there.

Tenner we've got, 10 we've got.

Do we see 12 anywhere?

£12 on this one?

We have a maiden bid of 10, we're gonna be selling at 10.

PAUL: Aww!

That's... (GAVEL) VO: Oh dear.

Sadly no power whatsoever in that thing.

Aww!

So much for automotive wall art, then.

(LAUGHS) VO: Joe and Catherine are playing petanque now.

Will they win?

20.

£20.

VO: I can't look!

Tenner.

£10.

10.

12.

15.

15 beats me.

Do we see 18?

£18 on this one?

We're gonna be selling at £15.

No!

CATHERINE: No!

AUCTIONEER: Sold at 15.

(GAVEL) VO: Well those boules certainly dropped.

That is a right pain in the balls, that one, I mean... That's it.

The little French boules.

VO: Hey, let's raise the tone with Peter and Paul's last lot, shall we?

The silver gilt goffering iron and spirit burner.

We're starting this one at 80.

85, 90.

PETER: Oh!

CATHERINE: They're brilliant.

90 we've got, 90 we've got.

Do we see 95 anywhere?

£95 on this one.

I think they're worth more than that.

On the book at 90.

We are going to be selling, then, at £90.

(GAVEL) VO: Well, a fine finish there with a classy lot.

JOE: 90 quid.

PAUL: Hey.

90 quid, well done.

I think they were brilliant.

VO: A last chance now to locate your pituitary gland with Joe and Catherine's medical poster.

We're starting this one at 20.

22, 25.

Come on, we're gonna get this one, we're gonna get this one.

It's a good start.

32.

35.

38 beats me.

38 beats me, 38 beats me.

Do we see 40 anywhere?

£40?

40 we've got.

42.

45.

Oh, my word.

Well, that's taken my breath away.

£60.

65.

100.

£100.

We're in the center at £100.

JOE: What did you pay for it?

PETER: 30 quid.

Are we done?

Selling then, £100.

PETER: (COUGHS) Taxi.

(GAVEL) You need more than a taxi, you need a moped with an engine!

Oh my goodness!

VO: Yes, it's today's biggest profit by a mile.

Great work.

Are you any good at maths, Paul?

PAUL: Right now I'm lost.

JOE: Right.

Shall we go?

Add this up, yeah?

Yeah.

That was great fun, whatever happens.

Well done, mate.

VO: Amazingly, both teams made a profit on four of their five lots.

Joe and Catherine started with £400 and finish after costs with £438.24 in their piggy.

(GAVEL) VO: Which is pretty good, while Peter and Paul added to their £400 after costs, with £43.50, just pipping their rivals to the laurels today.

So how close is that?

Amazing.

All profits go to Children In Need.

Paul, thank you for such a great time, mate.

That was... PAUL: Aye, thank you.

JOE: And my expert!

PETER: I didn't expect that.

CATHERINE: Oh!

My pal.

That Peugeot sent us right back.

I'm sorry.

You guys are awesome, by the way, thank you very much.

We've really enjoyed it.

Right back at yous.

I would never normally say this, but I will say it.

JOE: What?

PETER: We won.

Um, anyway...

I'm gonna get in the car now.

I'm just joking, I am just joking.

I'm getting in.

Yeah, I know you are.

You guys, thank you so much!

JOE: Don't worry.

CATHERINE: Thank you!

You look after yourself!

JOE: Cheers Paul, cheers Catherine!

You were awesome.

PETER: How amazing was that?

JOE: I can't believe that I lost by a fiver.

What do you want to do now?

Um... Do you want an ice cream?

I wanna do another road trip with you.

You know what we should do?

We should try and recreate The Italian Job, then.

PETER: Yeah.

JOE: Me and you in the minis.

Yep.

Let's do it.

Can we call it the Greek job, cuz I'm a Greek?

JOE: Yeah, I don't mind at all.

PETER: You know what I mean?

Well, let's call it The Mediterranean Job.

PETER: The Mediterranean Job.

JOE: There you go.

Yeah.

VO: Grazie per il passaggio!

Arrivederci!

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